To me, You are the man I would marry in a heartbeat, I am just another ex girlfriend to you.
I’m not the same as I was. I’m guarded, stand offish, meaner, far less open, you changed me. I’ve been depressed for five months now, there are days I can barely manage to get out of bed, but I do it. I do it for my mom, for the friends who are still around, for the people I know love me-and you’re not one of them.
You hurt me, so deeply, and I’m never going to be the same. I’d like to be able to do something or hear a song without immediately thinking of you, I’d like to wake up not thinking about you, and I’d like to go to bed not thinking of you. And every moment in between that reminds me of you, I want that to stop. And it never will if I keep making this blind effort towards a wall. You make no effort to return the friendship. I’ve been trying, but I have nothing left to give, nothing left to try for. I gave you everything I had. My heart, my soul, and far too many tears. I feel like a shell. It’s not your fault I gave it all to you, that’s the way I was. But I’ve learned. I learned the hard way.
Kel said something that made me feel good, but so very sad at the same time. He remembers meeting me and thinking “she’s a keeper” your friends loved me, your animals loved me, but you couldn’t, you can’t.
You say you want to remain friends, and yet you make essentially zero effort
It has been very much one sided. Yes I’m there for you, but not making an effort is rude, selfish, and it hurts.
I remember every reason
You said you needed to focus on yourself
Every reason I wasn’t good enough for you
You said I wasn’t a rebound, that if I were a rebound you would have just slept with me and never called me again
That you wish you had met me at another time.
One minute we were being the cutest, sweetest couple, the next you’re leaving for a week, barely talking to me, ignoring me for a desk, then for your phone, then you dumped me in a dennys.